Stoopid Cat, Stoopid Mouse, Stoopid Rake n Stoopid Freakin' human

Righty tighty,

Just to get this whole thing going, I shall relate a tale somewhat old (about a month now), that will hopefully amuse.

I have a cat.. not the brightest cat in the shed but not too dumb either.

I live on top of an op-shop, surrounded by a cluster of takeaway shops and a small shopping mall.

I have a tiny back yard.

Hanging out in the yard with my cat, I noticed the little bugger was very interested in a clump of weeds by the gate... Pounce, jump, claw, out runs a mouse, bolting across the yard to hide in the opposite corner amongst some garden pots n garden tools.

There are a few mice around, no surprise with the plethora of eateries surrounding my gaff.  My cat, the fluffy beast, occassionally brings me a live mouse... he doesn't seem to know how or want to know how to kill em and spits em out at my feet. The pair of us then spend a bit of time chasing the poor bugger around the house, me lifting things up so the cat can get to wherever poor mouse is hiding, cat looking everywhere that mouse has BEEN not where mouse IS, 'til eventually mouse is cornered, I can grab it, bop it on the head with half a brick n pop it in the rubbish. So the pair of us kinda work together in the hunt.

As usual, Cat totally missed the mouse running to the other side of the yard and was excitedly pawing at the clump of weeds.

I amble over to the bunch of pots n tools n start clearing the area to give the cat access. Call the beast over, and he gets the idea and starts getting in amongst it.

Mouse has hidden behind shovel and rake so I lift these up and lie them down behind me outta the way.

Cat sees mouse...

I take a step back to give the cat more room... Rake is between my legs... My back foot lands on the Rake head, with all my weight in that direction, and no chance of doing anything but continuing to put it there, The handle of rake flicks up, Just like a cartoon, and I have enough time to think Bugger and duck my head just enough to ensure handle hits my foreheand not my nose.

WHACK! Bit of a sting in that one! I see stars, and instantly feel a lump occurring... stagger up to the freezer to get some ice.. no ice only a packet of Filo pastry...

So I spend the next half hour wandering around the house with a lump of frozen filo pastry on my noggin, occassionally checking my pupils in case I am concussed.

All good, and next day at work there is no surprise from my colleagues as I relate the story about my forehead lump.  They've come to expect that kinda shit from me :).

Nice

Score:
Mouse: 1
Rake: 1

Human: 0